Hello beautiful people. I'm looking for some relationship advice. I've been dating my current boyfriend for 8 months now. We have been living together for 5 or so months (I live with him in his apartment so I'm not on his current lease) and have signed a lease together that starts next September. So, basically we both are very serious and committed to this relationship. That being said, we're talking about getting married and engagement. His family is very supportive of this, but mine not so much. They keep saying that I'm too young (I'm 21) and things like that. I've had other boyfriends before, so that may be where they want more time spent with my current one, but it is very obvious that this relationship is totally different than any of my previous ones. How do I talk to my family about my plans to get engaged and married soon (like in the next year or so)? — Anonymous
What We're Sippin': Lavender tea, with a cookie.
Ah, families. You love them. You hate them. You can't live without them. Enter: a distractingly-smooth lavender tea to help you in times when you know you can't escape them, but you really, really, really want to.
Where We're Sippin': In front of our Pinterest profile. Or a physical pinboard. Just because your vision is being met by a little tension, doesn't mean you can't enjoy looking at it come together on neatly organized boards. #HelloWeddingSeason
Ginger Ále:
Hello, beautiful person! Lots of exciting things on the horizon, congratulations. Personally, I envy your confidence. As a Libra and all-around indecisive person, taking, nay, even considering these steps would take me years. So I want to commend you for this.
Approaching conversations with family about things on which you anticipate disagreement is another thing I commend you for. This is not an easy thing to do. Remember that marriage is a decision no one else can make for you. So when you approach these family members to discuss, be respectful, be transparent and be loving. Understand that they’re coming from a place of love and protection. Approach them with a lot of patience when you explain your reasons. But do explain your reasons.
That being said, don't be afraid to take things slowly either. Forever can be such a beautiful reality. But it's also a really (really) long time.
Mother Teresa:
Congratulations! Salud (*teacup clink.*) To tackle this with your family, I would suggest that next September, take your time and enjoy moving in. Learn to live with him…to live together, officially, on paper. At least for a few months. Becoming roommates will add a layer of getting to know each other, and it is something you will need to learn to do if you are planning on marriage. Then consider having these conversations with your family.
I think they will appreciate that you're taking it step by step. In their eyes, this is you thinking things through. Instead of deciding on everything all at once. You'll all be approaching the conversation with a little bit more overall experience with the idea.
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